Wicked Games
by thechangeofseasons
Summary: It was not true love, as such a thing did not exist. For we were fire and fire burns fast, leaving nothing but darkness and ash. "It was funny how we used all of each other and expected there to be something left." Trigger Warning. Mentions of drug use, depression, abuse, and mental disorders
1. Wicked Games

***I do not own the Harry Potter Series or anything in it. I only own my OC***

_The world was on fire and no one could save me but you. _

_Its strange what desire will make foolish people do._

_-Wicked Games-_

It had really started when she was 11 years old. Her family had been over at the Black's for dinner and tea, when she had met Sirius. It wasn't very memorable, not to anyone but maybe Adaila and Sirius. That was when she decided she didn't like him. Not one bit. In fact, in her later years, she grew to hate him. But that isn't important, at least not for right now.

"Adaila what are doing?" Her mother always spoke to her in a sharp tone, no matter what she was doing. But this time, it was softer, but Adaila could still hear the slight edge. She knew that the only reason she was being kinder was because of the other presences in the room.

She immediately put down the piece of asparagus she had been fiddling with. "Nothing mother." She said in a quiet but strong tone. She was rebellious even in her young age.

"Get your elbows off the table." Regulus, Sirius's little brother hurriedly whispered to her in a worried tone. She rolled her eyes, but did it. It would just be something to add to the list of things for her mother to yell at her for.

She had met Regulus before. He was a naive, dependent, little boy who needed his parents approval. He was the perfect pure-blood, easy to mold and control.

Her brother, Marcus, elbowed her and gave her sharp look. She looked down at her lap and made no movement. She didn't like it, but it would save her a beating later.

"Sirius, there you are." Walburga Black spoke to a boy standing in the doorway. Adaila's, green, calculating eyes flitted to him. He looked to be her age. She could tell right away what he was. He was what she wanted to be. She took one look at him and knew that he was not the Black his family wanted. He would rebel for the majority of his life and then eventually break away from his wretched family. He would have the strength that Adaila didn't. She could read him before she even knew him. It was curious. She knew that she would not like him. Despise even. But she found herself drawn to his energy. His defiance.

He looked almost exactly like his father, handsome (even at his age) and dark. His hair black and skin pale. His eyes were like storm clouds, swirling in a black sky.

"Sirius, come and _sit down" _Walburga talked to her son like he was a dog that needed to be trained.

He followed without reply and took a seat. She saw the passiveness in his eyes, but she also saw the hidden rebellion. She figured he obeyed his parents most of the time, but defied them too often to be considered well-behaved.

The dinner continued as planned, no other interruptions occurred. The talk was full of pure-blood superiority and proper discipline for children, as she expected. When she was called upon, she agreed to what was said, like a good pure-blood heiress. She didn't draw attention to herself. It would only end in abuse later. Sirius would sneak glances at her, but she paid no mind. She didn't want to give her parents any ideas about marriage arrangements. So she ignored him. He didn't seem to care though. His eyes were only curious.

Eventually the night ended and the Burkes traveled home. She did not say goodbye to the Black boy. No reason to.

They had to walk through the shop to enter their home. Adaila had always hated it. The room radiated darkness and evil.

"Adaila go straight to bed." The women she was supposed to call mother stood before her, with a scowl on her face. In her eyes, her daughter would never be as good as her brother.

"Yes mother." Adaila didn't want to make matters worse, so, with her back straight as could be, softly padded up the stairs to her room, as a lady should. Her mother liked to remind her of this frequently.

She took off her expensive coat and removed her shoes, sitting on the too-big bed. She hated her room. It was lavish, as her family was very wealthy, but it didn't reflect anything about her. Her mother had decorated everything in green and sliver, not being subtle about her hopes for her daughter. Her father did a weekly sweep of the room and confiscated anything that was suspicious or had to do with muggles. She had no privacy. The only reason she had a door was because she was female and her brother was male. It was to remain open, hold for changing, at all times and had no lock. Her window did not open and had bars over it. Her house was more of a prison than anything else.

Adaila began the tedious task of removing the mass of hairpins from her head. As usual, she began to think about Hogwarts. Ever since she was young, she couldn't wait to board the Hogwarts Express and begin her journey to greatness. Well, that was she believed when she was 7. Since then she had become more realistic. Her heart harder. She knew she was expected to sort into Slytherin and be constantly watched and judged from all the pure-bloods. Her life was set up to be full of nobility and grace and Adaila wanted none of it. Now that September 1st was so close, she was terrified.

Since she was little she was always worried she would be a squib and be disowned. The thought then scared her, recently it comforted her. But that hope was gone now. Now she would forever be apart of this horrid lifestyle. She always wished to be a witch, now she hated the idea. She would be told to kill the "unpure" and her survival would redeem her actions.

In the next seven years she would say goodbye to people she was supposed to love but loathed. In the next week she would be sorted into the house that she was supposed to hate. And in the next 10 years so many would be dead.

Yes, that was when it had started. When everything started to crack and break.

**Reviews, Favorites, and Follows welcome. **


	2. We Don't Eat

**I do not own Harry Potter. I only own my OCs.**

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><p><em>If this is redemption, <em>

_why do I bother at all?_

_-We Don't Eat, James Vincent McMorrow_

She held on to him as if he was going to disappear.

She didn't cry. She hadn't cried in a long time and she wasn't going to waste it on the arsehole she was hugging so tightly that her fingers were white.

"Hi, love. It's been a while, huh?" He chuckled lightly and for a moment she forgot about everything that had happened. She forgot about the pain and the loss and the depression and the bad thoughts that scared her. Suddenly she was seeing all the good times in her life. Being sorted into Gryffindor(which would only be considered good much later after it happened), kissing Sirius for the first time, talking with the Marauders and Lily in the common room. She didn't think about the beatings or abuse her family caused her or losing Sirius to Azkaban all those years ago.

But then she remembered and the sadness returned.

She didn't know how he found her, but she suspected Dumbledore had something to do with it. She didn't care though, Sirius was back and that was all that mattered. He had suddenly appeared at her door with Remus in tow and she had lost it. She hadn't seen either in 12 years. But Merlin did he look ragged. She didn't even want to think about the horrible things he endured for a crime she knew he didn't commit.

"Sirius." She whispered, almost afraid if she spoke too loud he would be gone and she would be alone again.

She didn't kiss him. It had been too long. Too much had happened to just pretend everything was the same it had been. Seeing him like this...It hurt so much. It hurt to remember. Remember all the things that ended her up hiding her magic and living in France.

She let go of him. "Remus." She grinned and pulled him into her embrace.

"What are you two doing here? Its dangerous. And when did you", she pointed to Sirius, "get out of Azakaban?" She demanded some answers.

"We'll explain later, but you have to come back with us." Sirius knew she wouldn't want to, but it was vital she returned with them.

"I'm not ever going back."

"Not even to see your Godson?"

"What?" Her face was full of surprise. She paused. "Harry's alive? Oh Merlin. I'll get my stuff." She disappeared into the small house and then appeared with a suitcase she quickly shrinked. "I always have a bag packed just in case."

She was so scared, but sensed the urgency in Sirius and Remus and knew she had to do this. For herself and for Harry.

She would have to face her past and the thought terrified her.

But then she saw Sirius and Remus standing there and realized not all of her past was bad.

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><p>Apparating after so long made it feel she was doing it for the first time. She side-alonged with Remus but the nausea overtook her and the vomit was in her throat by the time they landed safely in Grimmauld Place.<p>

"Sirius, toilet ." She spoke hastily.

"Right. This way."

For the next couple minutes you would have been able to hear (and smell) Adaila's stomach contents exit her body from the restroom.

When she was done, she slowly stepped out and took in her surrounding. It was a bit overwhelming seeing Sirius's family home again after so many years.

"Where's Harry?" She demanded. She needed to know that he was okay. That he was really alive. Everything else could wait for the moment.

"Er, well...He's at Hogwarts. It _is_ the middle of the school year. Really, you should have thought of that." Sirius explained quickly. To be honest he just didn't want her to attack him.

Adaila had to exhale slowly to not lose her temper. "Yeah, that makes sense." Sirius just gaped at her. "So then what do you need me here for? Its not that I'm not happy to see you both, but whats happened?"

"Since when are you so calm?!"

"Sirius, we haven't seen her in 14 years. People change." Remus spoke quietly, like he still couldn't believe she was really here.

"Its okay Remus. I had a lot of time to think and I worked through a lot while I was gone. I'm still not the most optimistic person in the world, but I'm better than I was."

"Well, that's good. Isn't it Sirius?" Sirius still seemed a bit dazed, but he nodded.

They all could feel the weight of unwanted memories. Seeing each other without everyone there was difficult. Without James's jokes or Peter's supposedly unwavering loyalty. Without Lily's scolding or cheek-breaking smiles. But thats all that was left for Adaila now. Memories and long-forgotten whispers.

"We're gathering up Order members again and Dumbledore knew where to find you. Voldemort's alive. He attacked Harry."

"Bloody hell. Is Harry alright?"

"He's fine, a bit traumatized as anyone would be."

"Thank Merlin." She breathed. "When will I get to see him?" She looked at them both.

"Christmas most likely" Remus chimed in.

" Well that's close enough. Only about a week or two. As long as you both keep me posted about him."

She paused for a few moments.

"Have you found him? Peter?" Adaila had to ask.

"Yes, but he ran. It was the full moon and Remus transformed without wolfsbane and he managed to slip away."

"Oh. Well, has there been any trace of him?"

"No, he's most likely staying by Voldemort's side. We won't find him unless he wants us to." Remus piped.

"There has to be something we can do!" Adaila was starting to get frustrated. This was ridiculous. There had to be some way to find him.

" 'friad not, love. And besides, Dumbledore doesn't want us trying anything right now." Sirius sighed.

"Fine," huffed Adaila, "but I'm not going to sit on my arse forever, waiting for the okay from Dumbledore."

"There's the bird I know." Sirius grinned.

"I thought I told you not to call me that." Adaila grumbled.

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><p>Standing next to Molly Weasley, was somewhat of a bittersweet experience. They were all waiting in Mungos to see how Arthur was doing. She had looked up to her when she was in The Order, but when Fabian and Gideon, Molly's younger twin brothers, were killed, Molly and Arthur decided to move and protect their kids. When she left, it hit the Order hard. She was the big sister to all the younger members of the Order, including herself, Sirius, Remus and James. Seeing her brought up memories Adaila would much rather forget.<p>

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><p>"<em>Adaila, shhh. We have to be quiet." Fabian Prewett whispered loudly. He looked around the auror bathroom suspiciously. She was being much too vocal. The Order meeting had just finished and Adaila wanted to get a quick shag in.<em>

"_Just shut up and fuck me Fab. We have to be quick. Don't want Molly to find us." She kissed him with an urgency and a passion. Somehow in the next few minutes half of their clothes were littered around the dirty floor and Adaila was up against the stall door rubbing against Fabian like her life depended on it._

_She and Fabian had decided to have some "fun" with each other about a month back. She and Sirius weren't together anymore, so why not? She hadn't talked to Sirius or even James since they broke up. Sure they saw each other at Order meetings, but so far they hadn't had any missions together so they hadn't conversed. Fabian was ready and willing so they had started shagging a bit after that._

_Adaila heard the door open._

"_Adaila?"_

_The look of pain on his face was heart-breaking._

_Sirius._

_Shit._

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><p>Adaila was pulled from the memory. Someone else had arrived. Sirius nudged her and she turned around.<p>

She was sure it was James, but then she saw his eyes and knew them immediately.

"Harry."

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><p><strong>Basically at this point I have no idea what I'm doing with this plot. Ah well, fuck it. I'll figure it out along the way. My vague ideas for this story are really not enough and it probably wasn't a great idea to publish this, but again, fuck it. <strong>

**Reviews, Favorites, and Follows welcome and greatly appreciated.**

**-Changes**


	3. Porcelain

_In my dreams I'm dying all the time_

_Then I wake and its kaleidoscopic mind_

_I never meant to hurt you_

_I never meant to lie_

_-Porcelain, Moby_

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><p>She nearly starts sobbing when she first see him. He looks too much like James for her to have any other reaction.<p>

"Harry." Adaila wants to run and hug him, but he doesn't know who she is. Merlin, it just _hurt_ to see the confusion on his face. He should have _known_ her. He should have grown up with her and Sirius's little girl. He should have _known_ her.

"Sorry, who is this?" He looks at Sirius. She's crying by now. She told herself she wasn't going to cry, but she knew it was a lie. It was the first time in 14 years of running.

"I'm Adaila," She murmured, "I was friends with your mum and dad and in the Order."

She's so unsure about everything in that moment. Oh, Merlin she just wants them back. She needs them back. James and Lily were the only constants in her life and then they were gone and she went mad.

He doesn't reply and suddenly Sirius is holding her. He knew how much this was going to hurt her. And then shes a bawling mess on the floor and she knows her insanity is back. It never left.

The room is spinning and she can't breathe but she can just make out the face of someone in front of her, and all she can think is that she's back in that dark room, being tortured and then she's screaming and kicking at whoever is holding her.

"NO! LET ME GO! JUST KILL ME. PLEASE! JUST KILL ME! I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE! MAKE IT STOP!" Her screams are stifled by her tears and sobs. She can still hear his maniacal laugh and still feel her skin rip and tear.

She wants to scream in agony. She wants to blame someone. She just wants it to end.

But she settles for sleep. It seems easier, to avoid the pain of it for just a few more hours.

She wants to see her friend's faces again, but the sleep is dark and dreamless and suddenly she wished she had stayed awake.

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><p>Seeing her laying there, unconscious, he is racked with guilt. He knew what this would do to her. He knew he wasn't good for her, but she was good for him and he is selfish when it comes to her.<p>

He should have never let Dumbledore convince him to find her. Remus fought him on it, knowing the damage they had all already caused her. All the pain and madness they imposed upon her. He should have _listened_. He was never very good at listening though.

" From what I've gathered, she had a flashback to a traumatic experience and you triggered it when you grabbed her. Do any of you know what that experience could have been?"

"She was captured by death eaters in the first war and tortured. We got her out a few days after she was taken. They used the Cruciatus Curse. And knives. Something like this has happened before." Sirius informed.

"Merlin. Well, she'll be out for the next few hours. Only four in the room at a time. The rest of you, out." The healer announced to the large bundle of people gathered around the girl. Everyone exited, save for Sirius, Remus, and Molly, and Harry.

Sirius had a lot of explaining to do. She hadn't met any of the new Order personally yet. Dumbledore

didn't want exactly what just happened to happen. Too late for that now.

She stayed in Regulus's old room and didn't come down until everyone from the Order had left. She didn't seem to mind, she was really only there for Harry. She had only just seen Molly again right before Harry arrived so there really hadn't been any time for introductions.

"Remus, Sirius! How long has she been back?" Molly questioned quite forcefully.

"Only a few days. We thought it would be better to have her meet everyone at Christmas." Remus tried to explain.

"Well, it wasn't. Now the poor girls unconscious!"

"Molly, we knew something like this was going to happen. It really was just a matter of when." At this point, Remus was just trying to calm her down.

"THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT ALRIGHT!" She bellowed.

"Who is she though?" Harry just seemed all around confused.

"She was the daughter of Charius Burke." Remus sighed.

"Of Borgin and Burkes? In Knockturn Alley?"

"Yes, her father owned half the store. She was sorted into Gryffindor along with me." Sirius spoke from the chair next to Adaila's bed. "We were all mates back then with her and Dorcas Meadows. She was disowned by her family in 5th year, a bit before me, so she was also living with James."

"Why has no one mentioned her before then?" Harry was even more confused now.

"We all thought she was dead. Disappeared about a month after...a month after Voldemort was killed. We didn't like to talk about her." Remus answered this time. Sirius hadn't known about her supposed "death" until after he escaped from Azkaban. He hadn't taken it very well.

"She was important to us all." Molly spoke softly. "More some than others."

"Don't." Sirius barked. "You have no _idea _what the war did to her! What _he _did to her!You left! You left _her!_" He stood up.

"I left for my children! You cannot blame me for leaving to protect family of my own!" Molly snapped and Sirius knew he had crossed a line. "She was a sister to me, but I had Bill, and Charlie, and Percy, and the twins to protect. You know I couldn't stay after Fabian and Gideon..." Her voice faltered.

"Their deaths affected all of us Molly. But she...she was broken. And then you and Arthur were gone and we weren't talking and she _needed_ someone. By the time we were back together, she was already gone. The person she was, was changed by the war, and James and Lily were the last straw."

"And now we've dragged her into this. I knew we shouldn't have gone and brought her back. We all knew this would happen." Remus murmured. He started to pace.

"She won't agree to stay out of it now. She'll insist on fighting." Sirius sat back down by the bed.

"Why is that such a bad thing? For her to fight?" Harry inquired.

"It does things to her. To her mind. Last time she almost lost her sanity." Remus answered, still slowly pacing the room.

"The Ministry put her in here, actually, when your parents were killed. She was questioned and couldn't take it. Sirius was in Azkaban and I was in hiding and she didn't have anyone left. She was in the mental ward for a month. Then she disappeared." Remus moved to the window, staring off into the distance.

"None of us knew she was even missing until months later. We were told she was still in Mungos, but apparently Dumbledore had her released and gave her a way to disappear."

"But why did Dumbledore have you bring her back if she can't take the war?" Harry wasn't stupid. He knew Dumbledore would sacrifice peoples lives, but driving someone mental on purpose seemed a bit too much, even for him.

"Shes one of the best duelers there is. Could beat your Dad and Sirius with her eyes closed. Brilliant with DADA and Charms. She was a fantastic auror, but she just couldn't handle all the death.

"I reckon Dumbledore wants all the fighters he can get." Sirius and Molly were still silent. They were both staring at Adaila's sleeping form, seemingly in deep thought.

"We should go and let her rest. Come on dear." Molly broke out of her trance and guided Harry out of the room, leaving Remus and Sirius alone with Adaila.

"We can't do this to her." Sirius had not moved yet, still staring at her.

"I know." Remus stood and walked out. "Not again."

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><p>She never wanted her life to be this way. All she ever wanted as a child was for parents to love her. She just wanted a family.<p>

Maybe it would have been easier to be a muggle, unaware of the hate and evil of their world. But in the end she found her family. She found James and Lily and Remus and Sirius and Dorcas and the Order. She found something to fight for.

But it wasn't enough. Her mind still cracked and shattered, and her bones still broke. Her body still aged and her scars didn't heal. Family can't save you from those things.

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><p>She woke up alone.<p>

Her room was made up of white walls and machines. The harsh light from the setting sun invaded the room and lit the walls with dancing shadows.

She was surprised to find she remembered what happened. The one other time anything like that had happened, she forgot everything. Granted, she had only been rescued for about a week and her mind was still in shambles, and when she woke she remembered nothing. She had broken Sirius's nose and given James a black eye. They said she hadn't talked at all before that and tried to get her out of the flat and accidentally triggered a flashback. Everyone tipped toed around her ever since then.

She got up to change. The hospital gown they had put her in was itchy and she didn't intend to stay long.

She didn't think anyone would still be there. They were most likely in Arthur's room or went back to Grimmauld place.

She untied the back and let it dip, showing her back. She looked to the mirror on the wall and grimaced. The three long, jagged scars ran down her back and disappeared into the gown. She hadn't look at them recently, but she would always remember they got there. Her nightmares wouldn't let her forgot.

Seeing Harry in the mirror startled her. At first she thought she was just hallucinating, but when he started mumbling, she realized the Weasley's must have still been with Arthur.

"I'm sorry. Sirius asked me to come check on you."

She pulled the gown on again, smiling softly. "It's fine. I just woke up."

"Are... Are those from when you were captured?" Harry had to ask.

"My scars?" He nodded. "Yes, I've had them for 13 years now. Bellatrix LeStrange quite likes knives."

"I'm sorry. I should have knocked." He darted out of the room.

* * *

><p>In the end, she wound up back in the bed. The tonic they had given her made her drowsy and she thought it best to rest.<p>

Sirius came in after Harry had left. She didn't really know why he had sent Harry in first, but she didn't bring it up.

" You right, spooked Harry."

" I was changing. He saw my back." She looked out the window. "He seemed curious."

"He just wants to know more about you. Remus and I hadn't mentioned you before. I don't think anyone had." She motioned him to sit by her in the bed and he walked over. "He wants to know more about Lily and James's life. That's justified."

She opened her mouth, but then closed it. She didn't want to argue. She moved over and he laid down beside her.

"I know you're not used to sharing information about yourself, but he just wants to know his parents."

"Okay. Fine. But you know I can't talk about the war."

"I don't expect you to."

"How's Arthur?"

"He's doing better. He'll probably get released in the next couple of days. The Weasley's have decided to spend Christmas at Grimmauld place so you'll meet everyone there."

He could see the fear flash through her eyes, but the next second it was gone, replaced by a small smile.

"Hey. It'll be fine. Remus and I will be there, and you'll get to talk to Molly again and see the children. We'll have a good time."

"I know. I just... I thought I left that life for good a long time ago. I had already accepted I would never see any of you again. Seeing everyone brings back memories, most of them I would just rather forget."

They sat in silence for the next few minutes, just enjoying each others presence again.

"Adaila...Dumbledore wants you to fight."

"I figured. I'll just have to deal with it. If he's really back... I can't let him destroy more people's lives. I won't. Harry will have to be stronger than all of us. He's the one who has to stop him for good."

"I know."

"Sirius. He isn't James. No matter how much you and I want him to be, he's not. Please, be careful with what you tell him. He's only 15."

He nodded. "Molly's already given me the whole speel."

They didn't speak again for the next moments.

"Sirius, I really missed you."

"I missed you too 'daila"

They were content with that. At least for the moment.

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><p><strong>Okay. I wrote, I did it. Please review, favorites, follows. Please.<strong>

**-Changes**


	4. Retrograde

_Italics: 1976 _

Regular: 1995

**Bold: Letters**

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><p><em>You're on your own <em>

_in a world you've grown_

_Few more years to go_

_-Retrograde, James Blake_

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><p><em>The sound echoed through the room. She had taken slaps from her mother before, but this seemed so final. So end all. <em>

_The force of this one knocked her to the ground. That hadn't happened since she was 12. _

"_This is the final straw Adaila! First you make friends with mud-bloods, and now becoming romantically involved with a blood-traitor? NO! I WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS! YOU ARE NO DAUGHTER OF MINE!" Her mother screeched. She had seemed to master the technique. _

_Marcus, her brother, only looked at her in pity. She hated pity. She was much more used to the looks of hatred and fury she got from him. This was another clue that this was real. Her brother would never look at her like that unless her mother was serious about this. Sure, she had threatened that one day she was going to throw Adaila out, but she had never gone through with it. She might have hated her family, but she was still only 16. She wasn't legal and would have no money after this. She was screwed. _

"_I want you gone by morning. You are no longer a part of this family." Her mother sniffed self-righteously and walked out. _

_She was still on the ground, too stunned to get up. Her brother looked down at her once more, and then exited after their...his mother. _

_Maybe it would be better this way. She wouldn't have to deal with the constant arguing and hateful words. She was just _tired _of playing a part. She wanted to have a normal family. One that didn't beat you when you made a mistake, or stuff you in a closet for hours when your grades weren't exemplary. _

_She got up from the parlor room floor and calmly walked up stairs. She couldn't let her family see how shaken she was by this. _

_She would go to James. His parents liked her well enough. She had been sneaking out to James house since 3__rd__ year. It was easy enough, she just took the Knight Bus every other week or so over the summer and breaks. Sometimes Sirius would meet up with her, but was it much harder for him to sneak out because of his house-elf, Kreacher, who hated him. _

_Shit. She was going to have to warn Sirius. Adaila had a feeling everyone would know about their "relationship" soon enough. _

_Before she packed she sent Archimedes, her screech owl, to deliver a letter to James and another to Sirius. _

_She figured she could stay with James and his family for a night and then figure out where to go from there. _

_She was gone in the next hour. When she went down stairs with her shrinked school trunk, and some money, Marcus was speaking softly to his mother. He seemed to be trying to calm her down. The bitch was probably trying to figure out what she was going to tell her precious "friends"._

_Their eyes met for a moment, her face passive and his one of worry, and then she swiftly walked out the front door._

* * *

><p>Christmas arrived earlier than she would've liked. She had been released from Mungos the day before, but she was still hiding in Regulus's old room.<p>

She didn't sleep well. It felt wrong to sleep in his bed. She didn't know what happened to him, but she figured he was dead. He might've acted like he supported Voldemort, but he never seemed fully loyal. Voldemort killed because of loyalty.

She didn't know what Sirius knew of his disappearance, but she knew he cared. He was still his older brother.

She sat on the bed, not knowing what to do with herself. She looked at the mirror adjacent from her. It was old and rusted, but still beautiful in its own way.

The person in the mirror looked so unhappy, so tired. The black under her eyes, and the worry lines from her nightmares. She no longer was 21, that much was obvious, but she still looked too old, too burdened.

She could hear the faint outline of voices from below her, and thought it best to eavesdrop. She hadn't lost _all _of her marauding ways.

"We're just asking you all to be patient. She fragile, and we don't want her to have an episode again. She's gone through a lot. She's scared right now and she needs a stable environment. Just take it slow, don't overwhelm her."

Anger overtook her, and she stomped down the staircase to the crowd of people in the sitting room.

"I'm not a doll, Remus. I managed to take care of myself for well over 10 years. I'm a grown women." She snapped at him.

"Adaila..."

Sirius grasped her arms and tried to move her into the kitchen with him, but she refused.

"No! I'm done being afraid of all of this! I'm obviously not getting any younger! And I'm not going anywhere!"

It was time she explained who she was. Everyone in the room was staring by now. She took a breath but still practically shouted the whole thing.

"I'm Adaila Burke. My father was Charuis Burke, one of the owners of Borgin and Burkes. I was sorted into Gryffindor and disowned when I was 16. I lived with James Potter and Sirius Black until I got a job as an auror and could support myself." Merlin she hated this. Telling people she didn't know about her whole life story was awful. Her voice grew somber.

" I was a member of the Order of the Phoenix, and I was captured and tortured by Voldemort when I was 20. I was declared mentally unstable after and was put in Mungos for 6 months. I was en..." She stopped short. She wouldn't tell them that. It wasn't her decision.

"I went into hiding when I was 21 and moved around France for 14 years. Until now. "

She turned to Sirius."There. Is that good enough?" And with that she strode up the stairs.

By the time she reached the top of the stairs she was crying. But, like always, Sirius was there in an instant.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She messily sobbed out.

He held her and this time, she knew it was him. She knew it was the man she still loved.

* * *

><p><em>She stuck her wand out on the street, and sure enough, a few seconds later she was greeted by Robert and Ernie. Robert was the conductor, though he was starting to get a bit old, and Ernie drove. She had known them both since she was 13, after learning about it at Hogwarts. Her parents considered it "dirty, and below them" so they had never taken it when she was younger. <em>

"_Hey Rob. Long time no see."_

" _'daila I saw you a month ago." He extended his hand to pull her on the bus. _

"_But that's much too long." She pouted playfully and grabbed his hand. _

"_I'm guessing Potter Manor again?"_

"_It always is." She sauntered down the aisle, fighting to keep her emotions in check. "This will probably be my last ride for a while, just to warn you." The bus shot down the rode, knocking her back into the seat. It wasn't anything she wasn't used to. _

"_I'm sorry to hear that doll. Well, me and Ernie will miss you."_

_Rob didn't ask questions. It was one of things she liked about him. _

"_Of course you will." Her facade kept up well, the confident, beautiful, prankster who didn't have a care in the world. _

_She enjoyed being unapproachable. It made things easier for her in the long run. Her walls were impenetrable to anyone who weren't her closet friends. _

_She was vulnerable too often now for her liking. With her family and the pressure from the Slytherins at school, the toll was beginning to take. She was ignoring Lily, their last conversation fresh in her mind. _

_The bus stopped in front of the gate to Potter Manor. She stood and walked to the front."Thanks boys. See you when I see you." She lazily saluted and jumped down the steps. _

_The bus sped away and she was left outside the gate. Archimedes whistled down to her. She had told him to wait for her once he was done with James. _

"_Hey, come here you stupid bird. You need to get back in your cage already." He was usually uncooperative, but he got the job done. However much she told herself, and others, she hated him, they still had a mutual understanding of one another. That was all she could ask for in a relationship like theirs. _

"_Yeah, yeah. I know you hate it, but Mrs. Potter won't let you stay if you aren't in your cage."_

_He stared down at her, and even though his eyes were motionless, she had a feeling he was rolling his them. He finally seemed to give up and swooped down to the open cage, and, somewhat grudgingly, hopped inside. _

"_Merlin you're stubborn."_

_James was nice enough to get his Dad to take down the wards for her. She was glad he took her instructions and didn't meet her at the gate. She pulled the gate open and started the quarter mile to the Manor._

* * *

><p>Sirius had eventually led her back into her room, where they sat for what seemed like forever.<p>

"I shouldn't have blurted that all out. I'm sorry." She whispered after minutes of silence.

"It's fine love. It's a overwhelming for everyone."

"I have to apologize, don't I?"

"That would be best." He grinned and pulled her into his lap.

"If I'm going to apologize you're going to have to let me go." She smirked. She had missed this.

His face grew serious. "Never." He murmured.

* * *

><p><em>She hadn't even rang the door bell before James opened the door and pulled her in. <em>

"_What happened?! You didn't say in your letter. Did they hurt you?" James and the rest of the Marauders knew about her parents choice of "discipline" for her. _

"_Of course they did. They do every time." She yanked her arm back from his tight grip and rubbed it._

_He muttered a sorry._

"_This time is for good though. Disowned."_

"_Adaila. I'm sorry. I'm sure my mum and dad will let you stay here for however long."_

"_Its fine. I'll be out of your hair in the morning. I just need to figure out what I'm going to do."_

"_Oh nonsense, love!" James's mother, Dorea, exclaimed. She had just entered the room from the kitchen. "You'll stay until you have an adequate place to live."_

"_Hey Mrs. P." Adaila spoke affectionately. _

"_I thought I told you to call me Dorea." She crossed the room and engulfed Adaila into a hug. It felt good to have people who actually loved her around. _

"_You must be exhausted."_

"_We can get you set up in your room." Mr. Potter walked into the foyer and ruffled her hair. They had both been her and Sirius's stand-in parents for years now._

"_I'll take her up." James grabbed her hand and lead her up the stairs. _

"_Thank you!" She called back to the Potters. _

_They kept walking until they reached a red hallway, which she knew as the hall where Sirius and her usually stayed during summers and breaks. She started to walk the rest of the way to the door, but before she could James grabbed her arm._

"_You're going to have to tell someone eventually you know."_

_She met his eyes."I've told everyone who I want to know. Just...respect that. Please. Goodnight James." And with that she walked into the bedroom, gave Archimedes his dinner and fell on the bed, already asleep._

* * *

><p>"I need to apologize. I've been pushing everyone away for a long time and it's hard for me to break that habit. I don't even know most of you and you probably already hate me. I'm not asking you to forgive me, and I'm not expecting you to want to be mates, but it would be nice if I was on at least friendly terms with everyone. So...I'm sorry for being a tosser."<p>

The Weasley's and company stared back at her. Molly stood and bustled over to her, and engulfed her in a hug.

"Dear, I could never hate you."

"You seem a bit weird," One of the Weasley twins spoke up.

"but that's okay," the other continued.

"we like weird!" The first finished.

She grinned. James would like them.

Her gaze met Harry's. Her grin faded

"If my parents were friends with you, I guess you can't be that bad."

She smiled softly, thinking of how much he was like James and Lily.

She had a feeling he would turn out alright.

* * *

><p><em>Waking up in the Potter Manor didn't faze her. She had done it before. This was her home-away-from-home. Well, she guessed she didn't have a home to being with now, so that saying didn't really work in her situation. <em>

_When she got up to change, she noticed a letter on the windowsill. Probably from Sirius. It looked like his owl, Ophelia, hadn't been able to get inside last night, so she just left it on the sill. She opened the window,breathing in the morning air, and grasped the envelope in her hand. She moved to the sitting chair in the room and began reading the hastily scribbled letter. _

_**Dear Daila,**_

_**I hope you are okay. I'm glad you're staying at James's, the Potters will take care of you. Don't run off and make me find you. I'd rather not spend the energy. I'm going to try and sneak off. Please, just wait for me to get there. **_

_**-Padfoot**_

_She sighed. She wasn't planning on staying that long, but she guessed it was for the best. Besides, she hadn't seen him since the end the end of 5__th__ year. Now, it was almost start of term. _

_A knock sounded from the door. "Adaila? Are you awake?"_

_Annoyance flashed through her. She threw upon the door._

"_James, just because I'm not a Burke anymore doesn't mean that I'm fragile. In fact, we should be celebrating."_

"_Whatever. We have to go meet Sirius at the gate. We can take our brooms." He grinned._

"_Brilliant." She went back inside her room and grabbed her Moontrimmer 75'. _

"_Let's go already. He'll be here soon." James took off in stride to go grab his Sliver Arrow in the shed. "I'll meet you out the door!" He called back to her as he disappeared down the hall. _

_Riding her broom after the whole summer holiday felt amazing. She had forgotten how much she loved it. James caught up to her soon enough and then they were racing down the path, with Rutherford, James's owl, carrying Sirius's broom that he kept at the Potter's. _

_As soon as she saw his figure right inside the gate, she slowed her broom down and took off in a running start. He seemed mildly surprised to see her, but his face quickly transformed into a grin. She heard James dismount after her, but she kept running. Soon enough, she rammed into Sirius and his embrace. _

"_I'm sorry, love." He whispered into her ear.  
>"Don't be. You're here now." She closed her eyes. She hadn't realized how much she had missed him until now. <em>

"_Oi! I'm right here! She's not the only one you haven't seen in forever!" James told Sirius in an annoyed tone._

_She let go of Sirius and faced James. "Yeah well, you got to write to him. I didn't. So calm the fuck down Prongs. I'll return your boyfriend to you in a minute." _

_James only pouted, and Sirius laughed and went back to hugging her. _

_Regardless of her doubts, she was just glad he was back. She could deal with her emotions later._

* * *

><p><strong>I'm sorry this took so long for me to finish. I was trying to figure out exactly where I wanted to go with this, and so planning took up a few days. Plus my school is super crazy right now and I have lots of personal problems I would rather not have. So I've been busy. <strong>

**James made an appearance this chapter, and I promise to have Lily in the next couple of chapters. **

**Also, reviewers from now on will get a sneak peek at the next chapter.**

**I hope you enjoy!**

**Reviews, Favorites, Follows welcome and appreciated. **


	5. AN and Monty Oum

This has nothing to do with HP or with WG, but this affected me greatly and I felt that I should at least say something.

On February 1st, 2015, Monty Oum passed away. Monty was an employee at Rooster Teeth, a production studio that posts to their website, , and Youtube primarily. He was the creator of RWBY, an animated web series. He was an inspiration to so many, myself included, and he will not be forgotten.

He was a talented animator and creator, and he will be missed.

I'm not going to go into details to respect his family, but if you want to support his family in this hard time, you can donate to them at /montyandsheena

I was always so grateful to him, for his amazing animation, and his kind words.

The RT community is recovering now, but our lives won't be the same after losing him at such a young age. I ask all of you reading this to please be respectful. Do not harass the RT staff or use his death to further a plot.

I'm sorry I don't have an update just yet, but I am recovering and I will need some time to process this awful thing.

Thank you for reading and have a great day.

-Changes


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